Faith · inspirational

From the Other Side of the Pulpit

I knew when we closed the doors of our church this last year it would be hard.  I liken it to dealing with a death in a family.  I think I’ve gone through almost all those familiar stages of grief: anger, disbelief, shock, sadness and acceptance.  When we first began visiting other churches, I really wanted to stay at home and cry.  The thought of meeting people, being friendly, making small talk and act as if we were normal visitors – was too much to think about.  In fact, during praise and worship, I usually had tears streaming from my eyes and hoped no one noticed.   Now I think the stage we’re in now  would be close to ‘moving on” stage.  That part where you try to push past – the past – and start new.  So – in that spirit of doing a new thing – we’ve continued our quest of finding a church home and I can sum up the experience in one word – WEIRD!  Not that the churches are weird – not at all.  It’s just WEIRD being on this side of the pulpit.  It is hard not to sit and critique how the services are conducted or the music choices (quit picking songs that make me cry!)  or sermon points (that more my husband than me).   I am just now settling in to my new normal of visiting and actually – being a visitor.  I really know how folks felt upon visiting our church now.  It is overwhelming!  As far as finding a church home ourselves, we’ve not felt a strong enough pull to actually join a church yet.  I liken it to dating we’ve found some really great places we enjoy spending time with – but we don’t see our selves committing to.  It dawns on me that is what the majority of people feel about church in general.  So – where do we go from here?  I guess we either commit or continue “dating” other churches till we find the “one.”  I know , I know – no church is perfect because it doesn’t have perfect people.  I’ve heard that – even said it from our pulpit.  But – I know there has to be one that feels like “home” and in turn – one my husband and I both will agree on.    I just hope it’s soon because it feels like we’re speed dating.


12 thoughts on “From the Other Side of the Pulpit

  1. You and your husband are going through what a lot of us have experienced. Maybe not the EXACT same circumstance, but similar. My wife and I try to say, “We are just in ‘the meantime’.” What are you doing in ‘the meantime’? I will pray for you both in finding a new area of ministry.

  2. Great post, thank you for sharing your thoughts – it’s very interesting to hear your journey from the perspective of coming from ‘the other side of the pulpit’ but yes there is a desire for many of us to find a spiritual home and I think we only realise just how important that is when we lose the one that we have and realise that it takes more than people, a building and a pastor to make a church our fellowship. Although we are all connected spiritually, God particularly chooses to place us somewhere where we can grow to serve Him more fully as He calls us too – I also pray that this happens for you both sooner rather than later.

  3. Hi Suzy, You’ve experienced a loss, and part of this frustration is the grieving process. No church will ever feel like the one you no longer have. Getting to know and share one’s spiritual journey with people takes time and effort. God has a plan for you, as He does for each of us. Hold on, and He will bring you through this time. I left you in prayer.

  4. Hi Suzy, You know our family is in the same boat. I wonder sometimes if we will ever find a place to call home again. Thanks for sharing this site with me. It is nice to know we are not alone. Prayers always.

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